So I've got to have PIP training, have I? What the f*ck is PIP?
Apparently, in 20 years, I've learnt nothing and I need to go on a course to learn how to investigate crime. Well, I've got news for you. I know how to investigate crime?
Ok, I might struggle with a murder, butI know how to investigate the dross and drivel that gets reported to the Police. I rarely get to investigate a 'decent' crime. They're all snatched off you by some squad or other, if there is a likelihood of an arrest on the end of it.
How hard is it to investigate Sharon's report of nasty text messages from Tracey? Or Jordan's scuffle with Tyler?
Apparently, I've got to write my victims statement, in a different way, with headed sections. I've seen a few of these, done by Student Officers and they're crap. They read like they were written by a 15 year old chav in a PE exam!
The reason for this?
It will make the CPS's job easier for them. They will be able to read straight from the statement at court.
Now, listen here Ken MacDonald. I have to spend a lot of time preparing my case files. The least you could do in return, is to instruct your prosecutor's to familiarise themselves with them, prior to any trial. God knows, you make my job harder by insisting that the most pedantic enquiries are completed, so why should I make your job any easier?
5 comments:
When I did my PIP course I had to explain to the PC instructor how to do a Section 32 search !!!
There was a bobby on the course with 29 yrs and 360 days in. He was sitting at the back reading a book - the new Pratchett if I recall. When challenged about his lack of enthusiam he simply stated " If I can't smell a shit and bang him up by now then I've pretty much fucked up a whole career's worth of jobs haven't I".
Angry Dave
PIP is just another way to waste the precious funding that the citizens make available to us. It isn't actually about professionalising investigation. Strange bit true. It is about standardising the "product" which is something entirely different. Welcome to the McDonaldsisation of policing in which everything you could ever need to know is to be found in the flow charts and procedures set out in convenient 3 ring binders.
It used to be called the Manual of Guidance. It was well written and to be found in every Sergeants office. You just picked it up and read or you asked your colleagues. Now, well everyone needs to have been on the course.
i must challenge the inaccuracy of your post NJ you have a picture of a gentleman carrying files who you would have us believe is a CPS prosecutor. Come on now!The man in the photo clearly has a spine so cannot in fact represent the creature to which you refer!
You should take a BTEC in Policing and Detectivity to prove you know what to do.
Wall, head, wallop.........
PIP, PIP.
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